Trust me

I had a secret life about how I felt towards women; How I saw them as objects that provided pleasure, not as people with feelings and lives.

In a path of confusion and distrust, I viewed pornographic material and desired the life of the reckless pursuit of pleasure. I compartmentalized a life apart from reality, one where I was the center and my needs were of utmost importance.

My Mother-in-Law fell upon some very hard times where she lost her mental state, her job, her ability communicate, and take care of herself. It was in this time of searching for direction and help that the Lord revealed himself to me through his provision, love, acceptance, and forgiveness. God removed my 24 year addiction to pornographic content in one day.

Now I am active in the care of my mother-in-law. I am stepping out in faith in seeking how to share my faith through evangelism. I share my faith at work. I am helping start up an at-home bible study. I participate in our church High School Awana program. I fast once a month for at least 3 days to seek the Lord's will for my life. I listen and read only bible literature--I've tried to read other things but nothing holds my attention. I journal. I share my faith with my parents. I share my life with everyone who will listen.

When things began to happen with my mother in Law last year we were being taught about Jesus calming the storm in Mark 4:35-41. I prayed the Lord would bring a Tsunami into our lives. I prayed that the Lord would make himself so real to me. From that point on through the high seas of the ordeal, I didn't feel secure unless I was fully trusting in the Lord for my day-to-day provision. Now, I fast monthly because I desire that dependency that is only found in Christ Jesus alone.

I wasted my life for myself, now I live for Christ: to know the power of the resurrection; to crucify my flesh and to live a life worthy of the calling. To not be ashamed of my life or the Gospel and boldly proclaim the saving Grace and Salvation of Christ Jesus.