Thirsty for salt

Before Jesus came into my life, I was a selfish alcoholic, on drugs, engaging in anything I thought would bring me pleasure and make me feel good.

I remember in the center of my self indulgent lifestyle, smeared with drugs and alcohol, a friend at work who had been trying to speak truth into my life, invited me to a outdoor evening downtown. Live music, available alcohol, skimpy clothing dancing in the streets. My friend had told me that he would drive, he would pay my admission and even foot the bill for my bracelet for alcohol. I already had my own bag with the green stuff to slip into the port-a-johns and smoke. Best night ever, right! No worries of DUI, I wasn’t driving and he didn’t drink. No wasted money, he paid for everything. Didn’t have to share my dope, he wasn’t a smoker. Sounds like a selfish mans dream. The night in that context and mindset was as good as one could be. But there was one major problem! Waking up the next morning, thinking through all the success of self indulgence in the night before, I realized one thing. I was just as empty and miserable feeling, if not more so, than I was the day before.

Starving for what would bring fulfillment in life at this point, knowing I obviously had it wrong. The search for the truth was on. Growing up in church, I thought it couldn’t be there. But there, someone led me to the cross, I trusted Jesus for forgiveness of sins and eternal life. And it was there I found fulfillment that flows beyond my capacity to keep within the boarders of myself. Yes this was, is, and always will be Jesus Christ!

I have found it to be the greatest, most true, oxymoron in human history; there is 100% true freedom in 100% true surrender to Christ. I used to feel empty trying to fill myself. Now I feel the most full when I empty myself for the work of Jesus Christ.

I have found that the more I give of my time, my abilities, my money, MYSELF. The more I am satisfied and full. I have truly come to understand, it is better to give than to receive.

I have found all the promises of God pertaining to joy, happiness and peace are true. Also how the things I thought brought meaning don’t. This gives me complete confidence that I also can trust His promise for eternal life through Jesus Christ. He is the Way, the Truth and the Life.