The prodigal son returns home

What touches me deepest is knowing that God knows everything about me, and still loves me, just as I am. He wants me to grow, to love, to forgive, to reach out to others and serve - but He never forces me, and lets me grow at my own pace. I love how He has directed the paths of my life, and as I look back I can see how His hand has been with me every step of the way. I have learned to love the passage that says "And we know that God works all things together for good for those that love Him and are called for His purpose". I can trust that anything in my life that happens that He is with me, and directing all the events in my life to make it meaningful and good. I also love knowing the truth. I've been caught up in lies in different searches I had tried in finding God, the purpose for life, and what the after life might hold. But when I found the truth, and the evidence that the bible gives to assure me that this is the truth, it became so easy to see through the lies that the enemy tries to entangle us with. And once you know the truth, you can never go back to living a lie.

I was brought up knowing about Jesus by my grandparents. They would take me and my sisters to church, and I learned that I had to invite Jesus into my heart to be saved at an early age. My parents weren't believers, however. My mom went through four husbands, and the third was the one we spent most of our childhood years being raised by. He was of a catholic faith, but yet we never went to church. They tried to put us in catechism, but somehow that never worked out. The only time we ever heard about God or Jesus in our house was when my parents used them as swear words. They taught us religion is for weak people and losers...like my grandparents. They even cut us off from seeing them for a period of a year because of the way we would behave when we got around them. I still don't know the full reasons for that, but that year seemed like an eternity to a nine year old (and my younger sisters). Unfortunately, I never learned enough about my faith, nor had the encouragement to stick with it, so as I went through puberty and my teens, I turned my back on God. I started to live for myself, and began to lie, cheat and steal...the normal things that kids go through as they learn about life's lessons. I don't recall ever doing anything really bad, but I felt so alone, unloved, and confused about who God was...if there really even was a God, and life started to lose meaning. My grandparents continued to love me and pray for me as I went through this, even though it must have broke their hearts to hear my language and disrespect for the God they loved and served. When I was 18, my parents separated and my Mom took us kids and moved to Hawaii. We lived there for about 6 months, and my Mom and sisters moved back to California and left me in Hawaii to start to learn to stand on my own two feet. I only lasted a few months, and I became so homesick for my family and friends back home that I saved every thing I could from working two jobs to buy a ticket back home...and surprised my Mom by showing up on the doorstep late at night. I was using drugs (mainly pot), and didn't have a job, and after a back injury while working out, I started to sink into more of a dependent state living off my mom, and doing little to help out in the situation she was trying to work out. Although I had a herniated disc in my lower back (that wasn't discovered for another 3 years), my mom insisted that I move out on my own, get a job, and start providing for myself. It was probably the best thing she could have done for me. I started out as a bellboy at a Holiday Inn, and eventually worked my way up to the front desk. I went through a couple of different room mates, as minimum wage wasn't enough for me to make it on my own. I had always wanted to be a doctor, but my step father had encouraged me to follow in his footsteps in accounting and business. I had went to St. Mary's college while I lived with him my first year out of high school studying business and accounting. When we moved to Hawaii, I dropped out of college - which was probably a good thing, because I was getting involved in the drugs and alcohol, and my grades were slipping to the point that I probably wouldn't have passed them if I had continued. On my own now, I tried taking a night class at a Jr. college, but the pain in my back from sitting in the hard chairs, as well as not being able to keep my eyes open during the night classes caused me to quickly drop out. At that point I felt my life was going to be stuck working at a minimum wage job behind the front desk - so I just started to party with my friends, and essentially gave up on life. I did always have a curiosity about the after life, and if God really existed. I remember reading books about spiritual mediums that could talk with the dead, and the spirits would talk back through their hands on their typewriter. You can imagine all the screwy things this book was teaching, but essentially there was no God, and all the ancestors and friends that die before us are waiting to greet us and teach us about the afterlife once we die. Somehow I found comfort in this, and when I shared this with my grandparents, they tried very hard not to show the disgust and pain that I must have been putting them through as I shared this garbage with them. Me and my grandma even made a commitment to try and come back from the dead (whoever died first) to tell the other what it was like on the other side once we died. My grandparents continued to love me as unconditionally as they could, which made me love them more than anyone else I knew. I felt I knew better than them, and just put up with their weakness in believing in Jesus and God, but knew they always had something special that my parents never did. They had a peace, love and inner joy that I never saw in my parents. I continued searching for God through other religions, and even tried praying to different Gods. I remember chanting, and even using drugs while I searched for these spirits that would guide me into the truth. I got involved with martial arts, and remember a younger boy (about 16) who would always talk about Jesus. Something about him didn't offend me, but just made me feel homesick for what I used to believe. I was lonely, and about 21 - and I hadn't been able to find a girl that I truly loved and one that would love me back. I somehow knew if I was going to find a wife, I needed to go to church, because that's where all the good girls were. So when David, the young boy, invited me to church, I agreed to go, with the ulterior motive of finding a girl friend. The Sunday that I went to church, I don't even remember what the pastor preached on. I just remember the love that I felt in that church...like I had come home to the God of my childhood. I just wept through the entire service. I rededicated my life to Christ, and everything changed. At that point I didn't want to have any thing to do with girls, but just wanted to learn more about the bible and my faith. I remember going home, and cleaning out my stash, and giving all my drugs and parifinalea away to a friend. He thought I had lost my mind. I started talking to all my friends about Jesus, and how He had come into my heart and changed my life, and I quickly found that I stopped getting invited to parties and jam sessions where my friends and me would get stoned and play our guitars into the wee hours of the morning. I invited them to church...and a couple of them took me up on it, and one even came to Christ. I started to make new friends at church, and was "adopted" by one family that would invite me for dinners, had me over for prayer meetings, and we would pray and sing and worship God until I would have to go to work at 11 PM as the night auditor for Holiday Inn. I would have bible studies and friends houses and the church, and I become more and more involved with the youth group. My friend, Karey, who was the oldest son of the family who had adopted me, took it on himself to try to set me up with a girl from church. The first time I saw her at church, I didn't have a good first impression of her, as another young man came in and sat next to her at church, and she stood up and walked away, giving him a dirty look. I couldn't understand how a Christian girl could act like that. (I didn't know that he had been stalking her relentlessly, and wouldn't leave her alone). I still wasn't interested in girls at this point, and just wanted to get closer to God in my new found relationship. Karey, who was insistent about setting me up, asked me if I would go to the "Jesus" movie with him. I agreed, but then that night he informed me that he was bringing a girl, and that Gerry, the girl I had met and didn't care much for, also just happened to be joining us. I guess I didn't exactly hate the idea, so I went along with it. During the crucifixion scene, I looked over, and Gerry was weeping as she watched. I fell in love with her that moment. There is much more that happened after that, but needless to say, she was the girl that God had chosen to be my wife, and we were married within a year and a half (which seemed like a whole lot longer back then). God has directed my life, and lead me into chiropractic as a doctor, and blessed me with two wonderful boys that have their own stories to tell. They both love and serve the Lord, and although I wouldn't consider myself rich as far as the world does, I feel so richly blessed that money, girls, fame or anything else couldn't bring me more joy, peace and satisfaction. My life is filled with love for others, and God continues to guide my life, helping me to grow more and more each year.

I know that I have been adopted into God's family by the many promises in His word. It states that "If you will believe in your heart that God has raised Jesus from the dead, and confess with your mouth that He is Lord, you will be saved". God's presence overwhelms me so often that all I can do is weep and worship Him. His presence continues to grow stronger and stronger in my life, and I just want to love Him more and love others more because I finally understand how precious every life is to Him. He is not willing that ANY should perish, but that all should come to Christ and be saved.