My Testimony

Before I received eternal life, my mind was filled with a constant battle of worry and my identity was found in things that would ultimately lead back to emptiness. Throughout my younger years I struggled with constant worry and fear, so much so that I missed out on many opportunities due to fears and worries about things outside of my control. I struggled to be away from home while at school, counselors were never able to help me, and the worry grew into feelings of low self-esteem and insecurities in my teen years. As far as identities go, I was a competitive and accomplished athlete, a gym kid, a business owner's daughter, a lead choreographer, and yet none of those titles ever brought lasting fulfillment. As a result, I didn't really know who I was outside of our gymnastics business, and spent so much time filled with insecurities, not confident in much, and often too timid to grow lasting friendships with others, and I always felt like I was on the outside looking in.

This all came to a head when my parents separated after 25 years of marriage. My dad publicly left my mom for another athlete's mom from our gym, and the world that I found my identity in completed crumbled, leaving me with emptiness and a loneliness I couldn't even describe.

Then, in the summer of 2005, I met someone who led me to a church, and where I met some of the church leadership who welcomed me into their lives and shared the gospel with me over a series of several months. Their love and care for me sparked something inside, and upon hearing the gospel message for the first time, something inside me came alive in a different way, and while I didn't fully understand it all at the time, I was immediately ready to ask Christ to save me from my sin and to receive eternal life through Him.

After accepting Christ as my Lord and Savior, I fully believed in my heart, but not having a Christian community to grow in (and coming from an atheist family), I wandered for several more years, believing in my heart, but not rooted in my faith. It wasn't until January of 2010 that I began to follow Christ and surrender my life fully to Him, when I picked up the Bible for the first time and began to study it, and when I joined a small group and had others committed to discipling me.

And through the last 12+ years, God has done a transformation in my life. Once I began to know how loved I was, and the lengths at which Christ had gone to save me, I began to understand WHO'S I was, and where my true identity is really found. I began to find my worth in Christ alone, and received grace and love like I had never experienced before. Throughout my faith journey, it's been the greatest adventure learning the gifts God has given me to reach others for His kingdom, and the purposes He set for me far in advance, that I might bring Him glory. I have experienced a love like nothing I've ever known, and a community that far surpasses any relationship (friendship or family) that I've ever known.

Salvation is such a gift. I know that if I were to die today, I would spend eternity in heaven with my Father, my Creator. But salvation isn't just for when we die, it's the assurance of knowing the One who's made me for His purposes, who loves me beyond understanding, who offers me grace every single day of my life, and who shows me how to live and to love others well along the way. Christ died so that I can live, and I spend each day filled with gratitude and adoration for the gift that I can't repay and the love I cannot even fathom.