Jesus saved me from self-emotional abuse

I am happy to have Jesus in my life because He loves me, no matter what happens. He has freed me from self-emotional abuse.

I grew up in a very christian home, yet I didn´t really understand God´s love. As a teenager I got into more serious problems of feeling worth less. Later I began to emotionally abuse myself. I would often get very angry with myself when making a mistake like for example forget something or dropping something on the floor so it broke. Many of the bad thoughts I don´t remember anymore, but one thought was: "I am good for nothing". I also had several other bad thoughts about myself and didn´t like myself. One day I found a quote from a christian author named Ellen G. White. You can find it in her book "The Desire of Ages" p. 91: "He taught all to look upon themselves as endowed with precious talents, which if rightly employed would secure for them eternal riches. He weeded all vanity from life, and by His own example taught that every moment of time is fraught with eternal results; that it is to be cherished as a treasure, and to be employed for holy purposes. He passed by no human being as worthless, but sought to apply the saving remedy to every soul. In whatever company He found Himself, He presented a lesson that was appropriate to the time and the circumstances. He sought to inspire with hope the most rough and unpromising, setting before them the assurance that they might become blameless and harmless, attaining such a character as would make them manifest as the children of God. Often He met those who had drifted under Satan's control, and who had no power to break from his snare. To such a one, discouraged, sick, tempted, and fallen, Jesus would speak words of tenderest pity, words that were needed and could be understood. Others He met who were fighting a hand-to-hand battle with the adversary of souls. These He encouraged to persevere, assuring them that they would win; for angels of God were on their side, and would give them the victory. Those whom He thus helped were convinced that here was One in whom they could trust with perfect confidence. He would not betray the secrets they poured into His sympathizing ear." This doesn´t sound like Jesus thinks, I should think about myself, that I am good for nothing. This qoute really spoke to me. I felt like I was one of those who had drifted under Satans control and had no power to break from his snare. I couldn´t stop my bad thougths even though I knew they were wrong. But in this quote I saw that Jesus loved me and would speak nicely to me. I saw God´s love on a knew level. I also began to talk to God about my negative feelings about myself. When I did this, I got a new voice into my head. God´s voice. He told me, that He loved me. And little by little the self-emotional abuse was driven out by Jesus. And even though I still struggle with feeling worthwhile sometimes, I have been free from self-emotional abuse from around 2020, I think. Praise the Lord!

Today if I make a mistake, I am of course not happy about it, but I know that God still loves me, despite of my mistakes. I enjoy the freedom of not being tortured self-emotionally abusive thoughts. Jesus means more to me today, than He did before. I am looking forward to be with Him in heaven and spend an eternity together.