Jesus Loves His Wandering Sheep - My Testimony

I'm thankful I have eternal life because I know how selfish and mean I am on my own. God loves me still,though. I'm blown away that God would sacrifice His Son for my forgiveness. Through Jesus, I am being made new into a caring and loving person. God gives me assurances all the time that I am on the right path with Him, and that He loves me.

One instance is when I had been praying for God to empty me of my selfishness so that He could work through me to help an elderly lady I was caring for. Even though I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior as a young child, I had been living very sinful life. At her home one day, I was journaling, asking God to lead me on the career path He wants me to be on. Actually, when I first began to journal this, the woman's physical therapist knocked on the door. She very quickly told me that if I had been wondering, I was called to do this kind of work. I was astonished because God had answered me so quickly. I continued to pray that God would work through me and empty me of myself. God not only helped me to help this woman, He also took away the desire for the sinful life I had been living. I was in an adulteress relationship for 4 years. For several months before that, I had been very promiscuous. Even though my husband and I hadn't been together for 6 years, the sex outside of marriage was still wrong. I began to feel God telling me that I should not be with my boyfriend anymore. I had seen signs that my boyfriend could be very mean to other people and get angry. He could be also very materialistic and he used his family to get material things he wanted often. He even used them to get money so he could buy drugs. I went along with it for so long because I also smoked marijuana. So even though I felt bad that he was using his family, I still went along with it. My boyfriend was always very nice to me. Even though I saw him being mean to other people and lose his temper over so many little things, he was usually very patient with me. So I told God if He didn't want me to be with my boyfriend anymore then He would have to do the breaking up, because I couldn't break up with my boyfriend myself. Two or three days later my boyfriend broke up with me. During this few months I had been giving up my own will to God so he could work in my life, God also took away a lot of my other sinful desires. He took away my desire to smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, smoke pot, and engage in sexual sin. It has still been a battle in my head. I have bad dreams of my sinful past. The ex-boyfriend still contacts me regularly. I'm sad and feel guilty because my marriage is broken up, and my children have not been raised in a home with their parents together. I haven't been a good example for my children. Still, I have faith and hope because God continues to show me that I am now on the right path. Every time I pray to Him, He gives me peace that he is fighting my battles and He's always with me.

Because God is always confirming that I'm on the right path with Him, I know that His promise is true that I will be with Him forever in heaven.