From Haunted House to Inner Room: The Spirit of God

Before I received, that is truly received, Jesus into my life I often felt anxious and was careful about who I let into my life. Always afraid of others true motives.

I grew up in a small town and I shared darker complexion of my mother in a very white town. I could be bullied at school by both blacks and whites but I had a small group of friends that I regularly enjoyed being with. If one of them brought up a touchy subject with me I often lashed out at them. As I grew older this turned into anger and mistrust or suspicion.

I moved into a haunted house. I saw things, like dark, shadowy figures, and experienced what felt like attempted possession in the middle of the night, and I can’t logically explain them. I moved out after a year or so but over the next five years I realized that the negative emotions of depression, anger, anxiousness were following me. There were times my life was busy and good but I’d experience days when I couldn’t function. I needed to get in bed and rest because much of the day seemed overwhelming. Five years go by and I’m having a frustrating day so I started blaming God for the troubles asking what have I done to deserve this. Then suddenly I remember deliverance videos from my Facebook feed and I decided to blame Satan and any demons within me instead of God. Yelling at them in my home, I called them trespassers and cowards until much of my strength left me. That night I went out with a friend and got rather drunk. After waking up to get some water midway through the night I feel back asleep. The drinks had warn off and I was simply tired and glad it wasn’t morning yet. About an hour into my sleep, a demon started a dream and a set of events that made me question everything I had previously known. The paranormal was about to introduce me to God and much like Satan’s pride ignorantly pursed Jesus, my demons, ghosts and experiences were racing towards one another like particles at CERN, accelerated by my sin, desire for redemption and truth, and God’s unrelenting pursuit of me.

The dream began behind my drum set. I regularly wear head or ear phones while playing but this time the music I regularly listen to has a demonic hum under it. I take the headphones off to escape the sound. The music had a natural break in it and was beginning to start again so I placed them back on when they suddenly began exuding pressure that filled my head similarly to diving under water. The headphones began to, by themselves, pull away from my head as the pressure increased but suddenly I was picked up by an invisible force and dragged across the ceiling of my house. I could only see my legs and feet dangling below me as the floor quickly passed by. I felt absolutely helpless. I simply said, “God, please save me.” And the dream ended in an instant and I awoke in my bed with my heart pounding when my whole body began to shake like a violent cold chill. I wondered, was I just de-possessed?

The short answer is yes. The long answer is: my journey with God and particularly the Holy Spirit has taught me so much about sin, demons, life on this planet, the Bible and God’s hope for us all. The truth is greater than any movie, filled with more love than any fairytale, and empowered by belief and acceptance. The things that Jesus cannot speak of to Nicodemus in John 3 requires us to let go of much that we have learned. The truth is revealed by the power that works within us, for he can do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think. First we must renew our minds and learn the truth of our fall and come out of the great tribulation through the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimonies.

My experience in the haunted house exposed me to a truth not meant to be seen by man. But this experience created an opening for God to teach and show me more. He would never expose me to the fear inducing truth of ghosts or demons. He prefers us to walk in pure light far from all evil and unaware of the spirit world within the heavenlies. My walk with the Holy Spirit has put me on a path to become a spiritual warrior. To do battle for those afflicted by demons and fear. The truth is that we all experience negative emotions. These feelings are manifested by Satan and his hierarchy. Contrast this with the fruit of the spirit in Galatians and you begin to coalesce the truth of when and how frequently we are battling demons in our life. For fear begets fear and creates wrath and curses that perpetuates a darker energy in this world. We are so far from Eden that the truth has become blurred. A copy of a copy of a copy. We have normalized milder forms of sin that clouds our truth, our walk with God. Jesus’ mandate to be pursued by men and crucified thus introducing grace and forgiveness is evidence of the times. Much like the presence of radiation indicates nuclear fusion, His grace proves our growing ignorance of pure agape love for one another and His desire to reconcile us as white as snow. Demons manifest fear based emotions within us that in turned change the atmosphere and hope of the world. Our economy and societal division plays a big role in this scheme. Economist write books on human behavior pursing scarce resources; God writes a book on human behavior storing abundance in heaven. Will you survive the curse of Adam and Eve’s sin? Will you let your senses divide your soul and spirit? Or do you overcome our cursed flesh and walk in the spirit. The ghosts leverage your ignorance against you. Don’t be ignorant of God’s will and Satan’s scheme for you might just seek a house to haunt for yourself after the tribulation.