Forgiveness in Him

My entire life I was not a woman of faith and I didn't believe in God. In 2005 my life was dramatically changed, when my sister was brutally murdered by her boyfriend. A woman, who was once fun-loving and always laughing, became full of fear, anxiety, anger, and hate.

The man who killed my sister was found guilty and sentenced 21 years to life. At the same time it was like I was in a prison within my own mind. For seven years I was constantly tormented by fear and my hatred towards this man. I was so angry at what had happened to my sister and tortured in my mind by what she must have gone through in those last moments of her life. The hurt was so deep that I even turned my anger towards God and blamed him.

I truly believe that in an effort to show how his incredible grace and forgiveness power works, God revealed himself to me. In September of 2012 I had an encounter with the living God that would change my life forever. My experience can best be described by the Apostle Paul’s own words when he wrote, “The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus”. At that moment I received a new heart and a new spirit. Instantly, the fear of death and those tormenting thoughts left me. Anger was replaced with joy and love for others. I found myself with a faith that could not be explained or denied.

Through God's peace and love I have been able to forgive the man who murdered my sister.

Shortly after this encounter with the Holy Spirit, I went to visit him in prison. I looked him in the eyes and told him that I forgive him. I didn’t see a murderer sitting in front of me but a man created by God. I felt nothing but compassion and love for him.

He may still be in prison, paying the consequences for his actions, but I have been released from mine.