A Sinner in desperate need of a Savior

Before I received Christ into my heart, I struggled with poor choices, cheap thrills, self-centeredness, and pain from rejection. I was a party girl, a drinker, used drugs recklessly, and slept around.

I constantly was looking for the next "big thing" to fill a hole in my heart I didn't realize was never even being filled at all. I attended church from when I was little, but God and having a relationship with Him were never really a desire of my heart. The things of the world looked better to me (or so I thought).

I had lived the reckless, out of control lifestyle for years. Around the age of 24, I realized after so long of doing it, that I was actually really miserable. I was painting on a smile on the outside, but on the inside, my heart was screaming and I was beginning to break more and more every day. My life was spiraling out of control. Late one night, while sitting in my bed next to my then fiancé, I had absolutely hit rock bottom. I was sitting there at 4 in the morning, wallowing in my sorrows thinking to myself, over and over, “How did I get here? How did my life get to this? Is this really as good as it gets? I guess I have to settle for mediocre.” I happened to glance at the clothes hanging in the closet, and all the sudden, a voice from heaven I had never heard before spoke straight in to my heart and said to me, “Take your clothes and go back home, this is not the life I have for you, Tatiana. I have something so much better planned for you.” It was the voice of the Lord assuring me He was meeting me right where I was at, extending His hand to me assuring me He was still there all along. I knew exactly Who it was Who was speaking to me, my Creator and Savior and that I had nothing left of me but to surrender everything to Him. I had been running from Him all those years, and new in my heart it was time to stop running and surrender. If my heart could speak in that exact moment, it was saying this: “Yes Lord, I need You! I am forever am yours!” From that exact moment forward, when I accepted Christ into my heart, every single thing about me that once came so easily changed instantly.

I couldn’t drink like I had been doing, I didn’t want to be anywhere near the drugs, I didn't have the desire to party anymore and live recklessly, I couldn’t curse anymore, and I wanted to obtain from being sexually involved with anyone until marraige.

The desires I had once had for things of the world were instantly replaced with a desire to know God and seek after Him with all my heart and to turn away from the life of sin I had chosen for myself.

I now can say I know that Jesus Christ is real because of the miraculous, 180 degree change He has made in my life since accepting Him into my heart. I know for certain that when I leave this world, it is only to go to eternity to be with and enjoy my Savior forever. I am saved and have been set free by the One who reached His hand down into my deepest pit and saved me from myself so that I could be free to live for Him and enjoy Him forever.